Thursday, July 22, 2010

no emergency rooms

Fifteen years ago, I was my doctor's first lupus patient. Because of me, he took on the responsibility of learning everything he could about it. In that way I like to think that I am special to him, as he is to me. Many of you made me feel gently held for the last two days, thank you. I don't go to emergency rooms during the week. My doctor allows me to go directly to his office without any notice and he sees me quick. He has witnessed enough of my flares to warrant his sympathy towards the waiting room time that I would have to spend in some hospital and doesn't want me to suffer through that. He is an angel, our angel.

So, I showed up the day before yesterday about an hour after posting. I was in tears when he entered the room and I'm not a crier, so he was taken aback. "Whoa, whoa...what is going on here!" I blubbered harder and my husband had to speak for me. Well, he usually gets the details wrong because he is just as upset as I am, so I'm interrupting him saying, "No, no!" but still can't form a sentence and my doctor immediately gives me a couple of shots. hee

His nurses are also very awesome (and like family) so the newly hired nurse comes into the room to be introduced to me (being that they see me quite often) and here I am red eyed booger nosed and looking like a train wreck but managed a drug induced smile and held my hand out to her. (that's right newbie, you must shake the crazy lady's hand) hee hee

The rest of that day was a blur of television and heaving anything I tried to eat or drink. Those of you out there that expressed empathy because of your own shared experiences with migraines, can I just say this...throwing up because of such intense pain is the W.O.R.S.T-D.A.Y-E.V.E.R (!!!)

Yesterday I woke up still not migraine free, but at least the ice pick had been removed from behind my right eye. I braved going outside to potty the dogs and sat down holding my head in my hands. Sitting in the corner of my porch are all of my cactus/succulent plants. I briefly peeked at them and lo and behold a cactus that I have had for at least 10 years was in bloom for the first time ever! I smiled, asked it to please hold out until today and I am happy to report that things are down to a dull roar...
and here is that flower. Now I'm going back to bed...


boho girl said...

i think that was the cactus that cedar kept pointing at. perhaps he was trying to tell you something magical and healing. : )

i am so sorry it has been so painful for you lately. i want so badly to take away this pain for you.

i am amazed that with all of this going on, you still find time to be so loving and kind with me on the phone, listening to me about cedar. you so have the spirit of Jesus, dar. (and Buddha too...hee hee, had to say it. you know me).

love you, humble sister and am envisioning you surrounding by healing light.

ps. carsten wanted me to tell you that cedar said "dd" today.

echo said...

Oh my goodness, that sounds like the worst pain ever! Here's wishing you wellness and peace. said...

Oh dear. Hoping you feel better and better.


Jack K. said...

Sorry to learn that you have been in such monumental pain. Good to know that there is some meds that will ameliorate your condition.

I am sure your sister is correct about Cedar being a harbinger of good things. Your love for him and others will be of great aid to you.

Rest easy. It also sounds like you have an exceptional medical team to take care of you so well.

Thanks for sharing the photos. That could not have been too easy to take them.

Wanda said...

The delicate flower hanging on is a picture of you, my darling Darlene. You are a beautiful delicate flower, hanging on.....

I, like your sister, would love to take on some of your pain, to give you relief, but Pastor Dad and I will say earnest prayers and if ever we could do something more, would you tell us?

Loving you and J today and thankful for your wonderful medical staff.